Have you bought your Easter eggs yet? Of course not, that’s for the last minute when there are only a few sad broken ones left one the supermarket shelves and you’re wrestling with stressed-looking parents to grab them. To avoid this awkward situation, why not try these delicious beers to celebrate this chocolatey holiday.
Beer: Belgian Praline
Brewed in Melbourne, VIC
Average Price: $25
La Sirène’s Belgian Praline was the first dark beer out of the Melbourne farmhouse ale lover’s brewery. Debuting at GABS in 2014, this scrumptious chocolate delight took out the People’s Choice Award. Pouring a decadent, velvety and luxurious dark chocolate topped with a rich caramel head and an aroma of creamy choc-vanilla, toasted hazelnuts and brown sugar, this Belgian Praline is delightfully delicious, dark, seductive and oozing with opulence.
Belgian Praline opens with a dry cocoa bitterness that’s followed with strong notes of dark creamy chocolate, hazelnut and a stunningly moreish vanilla sweetness blended with hints of coffee and brown sugar to balance beautifully. You know that rather sophisticated chocolate that pops up at all those fancy parties? (It’s a Ferrero Rocher, in case you didn’t know.) Well, it seems as if someone took a whole box and just melted it down, bottled it and said, ‘Voilà!’
It’s a sumptuous chocolate dream that’s creamy, rich and smooth. From the moment you gaze upon this beer, unwrap it like an upper-class chocolate and let it melt in your mouth, to the last creamy chocolate nut drop. It’s simply spiffing. Hurrah!
Beer: Temptress Chocolate Porter
Brewed in Woodend, VIC
Average Price: $7
Holgate’s Temptress was introduced as a one-off back in 2008. The Temptress proved rather popular amongst punters and picked up so many awards that she more than tempted her creators by establishing herself as part of the brewery’s permanent range.
Temptress pours a deliciously dark chocolate with plenty of caramel froth to top off this luscious, rather sultry seducer. This alluring chocolate porter is mouth-wateringly aromatic with lashings of roasted dark chocolate, coffee and vanilla characters, playing the part she was born for as she lures you in.
She’s moreish, decadent, sweet with a dark side and delivers all your dark chocolate fantasies. With chocolate malt and the addition of Dutch cocoa, Temptress is a full-bodied, incredibly rich, chocolate feast. There are hints of vanilla and some dark fruit and coffee notes, all dusted in dark chocolate. She warms as she ages, revealing delicious caramel and a well-roasted, drying dark chocolate bitterness that will knock any chocolate craving right on the head.
Brewery: Batch Brewing Co.
Beer: Elsie The Milk Stout
Brewed in Marrickville, NSW
Average Price: $8.50
Elsie is a nitrogenised stout infused with lactose, Stop! Science Time…
When people talk of nitro, it’s a reference to the type of gas used in the carbonation process. Nitrogen beers (N2), take on a creamy texture and show more evenly distributed flavours while their lively, prickly CO2 counterparts are more aggressive on the tongue and aroma-forward.
As with any nitro can, pour it upside down and watch the spectacular chocolate fountain cascade down the edges, forming a deliciously lively choc shake topped with a hearty helping of burnt caramel froth. A sweet, creamy milk chocolate whiff greets the nostrils with hints of vanilla and a sprinkling of roasted dark chocolate.
Elsie is a beer that’s sweet and smooth yet dark and roasty. There’s more bittersweet dairy milk chocolate & cream in this stout than you would find in the Easter Bunny’s morning coffee. A rich, dark roast malt profile with gentle touches of roasted coffee and bitter dark chocolate notes balance this brew and a drying lactose finish creates a milk stout that’s creamier than a whipped cream party held in the milking room of a cream cheese factory.
Brewery: 8 Wired Brewing
Brewed in Warkworth, NZ
Average Price: $18
Here’s something from our friends across the ditch (the home of Middle-Earth), 8 Wired’s iStout. It is the brewery’s biggest beer, coming in at a hearty 10% ABV, its decadent, dark and delicious.
Pouring an almost charcoal black that’s darker than the depths of Mordor and topped with a creamy burnt honeycomb head, iStout is menacingly dark and splendorous in appearance. There’s beautiful rich dark chocolate aromatics with notes of roasted black coffee, caramel and a vanilla sweetness with hints of cherries and dark fruit culminating in a wonderfully alluring whiff.
A sharp and boozy dark chocolate bitterness greets the palate with a little roasted caramel sweetness to boot. It’s creamy, soft and delectably moreish. iStout is brimming with luscious roasted coffee and chocolate malt flavours throughout. An ever-growing warmth heats your insides as this dark chocolate delight softens in your mouth with notes of caramel, darker fruits and a drying resinous hop bitterness. It’s a big brew that creeps up on you much like everybody’s favourite, somewhat deluded hobbit, Gollum. Before you know it you’ve got a fire in your belly warmer than the core of Mount Doom and you’re screaming “iStout, My Precious”.
Brewery: Rogue Ales
Beer: Hazelutely Choctabulous
Brewed in Oregon, USA
Average Price: $21
Rogue Ales made a wonderful choice to take two of their absolutely fabulous beers and fuse them together to create Hazelutely Choctabulous, a glorious blend of 60% Hazelnut Brown Nectar Ale and 40% Chocolate Stout. You haven’t seen the likes of such a fantastic dynamic duo since Batman & Robin, Thelma & Louise or Cheech & Chong.
Pouring a delectably appetising dark cocoa topped with a frothy hazelnut head, Hazelutely Choctabulous looks absolutely fabulous. A sensational aroma of Nutella-drenched wafers with popping candy, mixed in with a plethora of hazelnuts and another hearty helping of dairy milk chocolate produces a mouth-watering whiff that will have any chocaholic salivating.
Hazelutely Choctabulous delivers, well, a Hazelutely Choctabulous drop. There’s a rich nutty flavour up front with waves of melted dairy milk chocolate, wafer and truffles throughout. As this divine drop warms the hazelnuts give off a wonderful roasted, deliciously nutty aroma that continues to delight the senses. It’s a constant battle between the Hazelnut Brown Nectar & Chocolate Stout to get the upper hand in this scrumptious choccywoccydoodah of a nuthouse. The end result is a thick, decadently creamy, chocolate covered roasted hazelnut that’s smoother than a fresh jar of Skippy.
As the American’s would say “It tastes like a candy bar in a bottle”.
Words by Dan McEvilly – Instagram @crafty_kev